Listen, you know and I know that you watched Saved by the Bell at least once, but possibly several times. Indeed, you had no choice, for there was this bleak period of television history in which it seemed to be the only show that was ever on.

As such, it is now your civic duty to save Screech’s house from going into foreclosure, because really, what are we put on this earth for other than to send money to aging childhood stars with fucked up lives?

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